If you're feeling disconnected and isolated because of your divorce, I want you to know I understand.
In yesterday's article for Day 5 of our novena, I mentioned moving from Southern California to Nashville after my divorce. After nine months in the South, I moved to the Northeast and found a great sublet—only to be told two weeks later that I had to leave. The reason the landlord gave was because "I was divorced." That would never happen today, but it was 1995, and it happened.
I'm not telling you this to villainize anyone. I just want you to know that if divorce has left you feeling cut off, you're not alone. There are a lot of uncomfortable realities that go along with being divorced.
The lonely realities of divorce
Every time you fill out a form, you have to check that little box that says "divorced." You watch as people slowly put distance between you and them—right when what you really need is a sense of community. Divorce can make you feel unwanted and unlovable, and it's a really painful thing to go through.
St. Francis approached the people others avoided
So we look to St. Francis for his example. He deliberately approached people whom others avoided. He cared for lepers who were enduring profound physical suffering and who were the outcasts of society.
In that, St. Francis shows us how our divorce situation can make us more compassionate toward others. Think of a cancer survivor speaking to a cancer patient. They both understand the suffering and all the circumstances that go along with having cancer. The survivor can offer compassion and wisdom in a way that others can't.
That's the powerful message from St. Francis: the very thing that makes you feel excluded is precisely what teaches you to help others feel included. If you know someone going through a divorce, reach out and show them some compassion—the way St. Francis showed compassion to others who were suffering.
Novena prayer to St. Francis
In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.
St. Francis, you cared for lepers, the people no one wanted to be around or have contact with. Being divorced can make me feel like a leper at times because of the loss of relationships and the avoidance of people who do not understand what I'm going through. Ask God to grant me the grace to persevere in this struggle and to be more sensitive and kind to others who are going through a divorce. Most of all, I ask for peace in my heart and for this special intention. I pray these things in Jesus' name. Amen.
Our Father…
Hail Mary…
Glory Be…
St. Francis, patron of peace and families, pray for us.
Taking the next step
If you're looking for more support as a divorced or separated Catholic, explore the Journey of Hope online subscriptions. The program offers Catholic teaching, encouragement, and practical support from the privacy of your own home.
Watch the video: Novena to St. Francis for Divorced Catholics — Day 6